editorial
Letters to the Editor
Published Thursday, 13-Nov-2008 in issue 1090
“Where is Jessie Jackson? Where is Al Sharpton? Why aren’t they outraged? Why does civil rights become a question only of skin color?”
Dear Editor:
We have just experienced an historic election; the first African American was elected to President of the United States. I was overjoyed, and wasn’t sure that this would ever happen in my lifetime.
But, this election was bitter sweet for me and many others from the gay and lesbian community. California’s Proposition 8 became our Achilles’ heel. The most upsetting fact for me was that 70 percent of California’s African Americans voted to ban gay marriage. African Americans know personally how discrimination and bigotry can damage the soul of our citizens.
Where is Jessie Jackson? Where is Al Sharpton? Why aren’t they outraged? Why does civil rights become a question only of skin color?
I am proud to have cast my ballot for Barrack Obama. We now have a President that remembers what America is about – life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness. I’ve never experienced a more moving speech in my life than that of Obama’s acceptance speech. I was extremely encouraged on how he made it a point to include every American, including gay America.
This is a time that we should all be rejoicing and uniting together. But as a gay American, I wonder when we will live in a country that is not separate but equal. I hope that some day soon – in my lifetime – I can truly believe that “Yes We Can”.
Hampton Shaddock
“As the chief executive of this state, where was Schwarzenegger since April publicly on this equality issue?”
Dear Editor:
On April 11, 2008, Arnold Schwarzenegger here in San Diego announced to the world at the Log Cabin convention: “I will always be there to fight against that (Proposition 8).” At the time, he got a thunderous applause and a standing ovation from the audience. Only if we knew what a crock of hot air that was! I cannot tell you how disgusted and sickened I am by the deliberate inaction of Arnold Schwarzenegger. He made no active and visible effort, nor did his wife, to go out there and educate voters and sway minds away from voting in discrimination. As the chief executive of this state, where was Schwarzenegger since April publicly on this equality issue? He hid behind the state budget impasse for as long as he could as if he could not chew and walk at the same time! He had ample time to act on his promise and to quite effectively sway in 15 percent, 10 percent or even a mere 5 percent from Yes to No on 8. He offered absolutely nothing of substance beyond his lip service. Honest, decent folks in positions of power do not wait to be asked to engage in and to comment on basic human rights in danger of being stripped away from a huge segment of society. As far as I am concerned, neither Schwarzenegger nor his state-recognized spouse Maria Shriver has the moral compass nor the basic courage to stand up and speak the truth, on their own without being asked, coached, begged or enticed. I cannot wait until their good riddance out of Sacramento!
Mike Karim
“Call it what it is – the Mormon Church, among other churches, was a leader in funding the Yes campaign, funding deceptive ad campaigns, and they stripped millions of Californians of their civil rights.”
Dear Editor:
I held a sign that said “Mormon Hate Out of My State” at the rally and march in San Diego on November 8, 2008. The “No On 8” campaign approached me and said they were concerned about my sign because the message targeted a specific faith which was against their campaign message of “love and equality.” They asked me to take down the sign and I refused.
Call it what it is – the Mormon Church, among other churches, was a leader in funding the Yes campaign, funding deceptive ad campaigns, and they stripped millions of Californians of their civil rights. Mormon contributions account for more than $20 million of all donations received in support of Prop 8. It is not Mormon bashing to point out facts – this is fair game in politics.
This is not bigotry against a specific religion; this is criticism against a powerful force.
Adria Stephanchick
“As we redirect our anger, hurt and disbelief over the passage of Prop. 8, we need to look at how we in the GLBT community do things.”
Dear Editor:
As we redirect our anger, hurt and disbelief over the passage of Prop. 8, we need to look at how we in the GLBT community do things. I hope we will include in our review of last week the spontaneous turnout of 10,000 people on Saturday to march for equality. This event was started by a few people with cell phones and emails. It was fantastic. It causes me to wonder if we can take a lession from that Saturday event and change the type of Pride Parade we have in 2009. Maybe having thoursands of people in the street, marching behind a Pride banner of “Equality for All,” will be more effective and meaningful than the group/business-oriented Pride Parade we’ve had. I don’t know. Just a thought.
Bob Boyd
“Maybe it’s time we go to the LDS temple in La Jolla or Skyline Church on Sunday and make our voices heard to those who voted yes. Have them explain to their children why they endorse hate while at the same espousing love for ones neighbor.”
Dear Editor:
I have never been more proud of my community than I have been in this past week. To see the numbers of people turning to stand up for what is right is awe-inspiring and brought me to tears more than once. Though it saddens me a bit to see some of the battered wife syndrome going on as well. At the march on Saturday a friend of mine had made a sign that said “Who Else Does Your God Tell You To Hate,” and he was asked by one of the volunteers to take the sign down because it doesn’t go with the message of peace and whatever else the “organizers” of the march wanted. When we told him it was our First Amendment right he once again asked for the removal of the sign. People voted yes because of their fear of god and gay sex. Yet we are being asked to not bring god into the post election discussion? Doesn’t that ignore the big pink elephant in the room? I saw someone on MySpace say “My friends dying of AIDS didn’t get their meds through peace and happiness.” Maybe it’s time we go to the LDS temple in La Jolla or Skyline Church on Sunday and make our voices heard to those who voted yes. Have them explain to their children why they endorse hate while at the same espousing love for ones neighbor.
Sister Iona Dubble-Wyde
“I am proud of our police department. The fantastic leadership and training shows through. Please express my gratitude to those officers who handled a trying situation so diplomatically.”
Dear Editor:
During the No on Prop 8 March on Nov 8, 2008, my partner and I, jean huy tran, were in a smaller group that went on a jaunt through North Park, rather than with the rest of the 7000 people that went to Morley Field. We left the park that was the “end” of the march along with a few hundred others and walked north, turned right on University, then left on 30th, up one block, then left again, back to University, then west on University all the way back to where the Water Lady store is. The motorcycle officers just let us keep going, making sure we were safe. They would roar ahead to the next intersection, block it off until we were moving through it, then take off for the next intersection. The crowd at the front was very much on edge … emotional, loud and almost aggressive. SDPD did a great job with this “mob”. I think things could have easily gotten out of hand if the police had decided to create a barrier to the group’s progress, or tried to be more aggressive. The officers that were present did a great job of assessing the situation and adopting an appropriate stance to the situation. Someone made a very good call on the spot, and diffused what could have been a disaster. I can remember a time in San Diego when things would have gone much differently. I am proud of our police department. The fantastic leadership and training shows through. Please express my gratitude to those officers who handled a trying situation so diplomatically. They are truly America’s Finest!
Steve Sallis
“As a community we need to calm down and learn from our mistakes politically, strategically and organizationally and there will be a better day. Where do we go from here is up to us, not the Yes voters.”
Dear Editor:
As much as I despised the tactics of the Yes campaign, the fact is their message hit a cord with moderate to conservative White and Latino Californians. At that juncture, we could not capture enough time nor money to catch up effectively. Of course, I am livid that our campaign “executive committee” ran woefully shortsighted, nor had any considerable seasoned and aggressive Sacramento or Washington political experience (until much later on).
But sooner or later, as a community we need to calm down and learn from our mistakes politically, strategically and organizationally and there will be a better day. Where do we go from here is up to us, not the Yes voters.
First, I like to say any policy fights with the Church (i.e. tax exempt status) at this time would be a wasteful one. There are petitions circulating around urging the revocation of the tax exempt status of the LDS; this is an exercise in futility. As a matter of law, the Church of the LDS did not violate the IRS code.
As I see it, we have two paths to consider. Currently, the California Supreme Court is hearing arguments to void Proposition 8 (led by Munger Tolles & Olson) that are legally sound and socially significant for consideration for a trial on the merits. I am afraid what Andrew Sullivan says is correct. He writes: “In my opinion, this brief makes a very good legal argument which, in a non-political context, would be pretty persuasive. However, we have here a hyper-political context, and I think the courts will have a very hard time overruling Prop. 8. Still, I think this is a responsible brief – if a dangerous and risky political move.”
First path: the ascendancy of a black man as President was not built in a day. If we use the same Referendum process, it must be done so in a politically feasible year – and only after we learned from our mistakes (which are more then a few), organize a grassroots effort (learn from Obama), and swarm a grassroots program through LA, San Bern, Riverside and San Diego counties. By changing the numbers in these counties would we realize opportunity. Identify the hard Yes and the hard No vote and work from there. But the fact remains, non-church going Yes voters are not ready to accept, nor understand, the issue from a civil rights perspective.
The second way is to take this new Constitutional Amendment, together with FL and Arizona and appeal to the United States Supreme Court on 14th Amendment grounds – which would be a less arduous road and less costly – but I suggest not in the next year or so, perhaps we will have changes to the top Court – hopefully on the Federalist side.
Folks we really need to take this time to think about where and how we want to proceed, not becoming emotionally intertwined with hating the Church or anyone for that matter - who doesn’t see it the way we and our supporters obviously do. Our time is not here yet.
Tom Mullen
“If Tuesday’s election taught us anything, it’s that hope, inspiration, dignity and respect should always trump fear, deception and political rhetoric.”
Dear Editor:
I’d like to ask a favor from all of the people who voted to take existing marriage rights and protections away from their fellow Californians. For just a moment, set aside the arguments about school curricula and church exemptions and any other debatable campaign rhetoric. All I ask is for you to sit quietly for 10 minutes and envision the conversation when someone you love unconditionally – such as a child, a sibling or a parent – tells you with complete joy in their eyes that they have been blessed to find their soul mate; the person with whom they believe they are meant to share their lives, dreams and hopes with. Exactly what are the words you are going to use to explain to them why that, even though you fully embrace and respect the relationships of their opposite sex family members, you will neither embrace nor respect their relationship in the same manner; and that you have already denied them the right to their life, their hopes and their dreams. And then think of any children they may have, be they your grandchildren or nieces or nephews, and tell me again exactly what words you are going to use to comfort them when they come to you scared and ask you why you voted to deny them the same rights and protections of their cousins who just happen to have opposite sex parents have and in which they take great comfort. If Tuesday’s election taught us anything, it’s that hope, inspiration, dignity and respect should always trump fear, deception and political rhetoric. While you are sitting around the Thanksgiving table with you family in a few weeks would be a wonderful time for you to think about all this. Thank you. And God bless all of us.
Bob Bagnall
“Bigotry and intolerance come not only in the form of Constitutional Amendments, but also in small and subtle ways.”
Dear Editor,
As an HIV positive gay man I am not at all surprised by the passage of Proposition 8. The same bigotry, intolerance, and prejudice displayed by the good citizens of California in the voting booth is the same bigotry, intolerance and prejudice that I and other HIV positive gay men have experienced within San Diego’s gay community. Bigotry and intolerance come not only in the form of Constitutional Amendments, but also in small and subtle ways.
Recently, at a local gay bar, a person I had just met pointed to someone at the other side of the bar and said “stay away from that one he’s positive.” Then there was the party I attended where someone raised his glass and toasted “to being HIV negative.” The other day someone said to a positive friend of mine “for my luck I will meet the man of my dreams and he will be positive.” And of course one need only read a few personal adds to realize that most gay men want nothing to do with those of us who are positive. I could continue.
Discrimination will now be enshrined in the California Constitution and the fundamental right to marry will again be denied to us. I feel I should be angry, upset or sad. I am not. The prejudice that I have experienced as a positive gay man in this community has numbed me. The callous words I have heard directed at those of us living with HIV, especially harsh from the younger generation of gay men – the generation that did not have to bury friend after friend at the height of the epidemic – have stung to hard. If I am sad at all it is because I cannot feel or share in the grief of the community over the passage of this hateful amendment because I no longer feel part of this community.
For those of you who have and continue to speak derogatorily about those of us who are HIV positive – under your breathe, behind our backs, yet right in front of our faces - perhaps you can take comfort in knowing that the majority of Californians are just like you.
Jack Hogan
“I’m not sure who makes this decision or how the money is divided up but something is wrong when our local universities get $62 combined and our major theater arts organization gets $45, out of a pot of $117,000.”
Dear Editor:
Recently, San Diego LGBT Pride listed their annual grant and sponsorship cycle payouts on their website through their E-Newsletter. The organization granted out approximately $117,000 from the annual celebration’s proceeds. I was shocked to see the disparity in amounts that were given out to various organizations. To start, The Center received $68,036.00 in total. Not only were they given a general grant of $47,000, but an additional $21,000 was given to support specific Center programs or events. Of course The Center does incredible work for our community but I was shocked to see that large sum, compared to what some other organizations received.
Other grant amounts ranged from $2,000 to “Balboa Park”, to the very bottom of the list – the SDSU LGBT Resource Center, which received $30. Just above that was UCSD’s LGBT Resource Center, which received $32. Diversionary Theater gets $45, Front Runners & Walkers got $62, and the National Gay & Lesbian Task Force gets $75. Other organizations fared a bit better, all getting over $100, but the disparity is obvious.
What is an organization like Diversionary Theater going to do with $45? And poor SDSU with $30? I just feel like it is a slap in the face to these organizations by giving them such small amounts… at least $100 would say “we value your work and are giving you what we can”. I’m not sure who makes this decision or how the money is divided up but something is wrong when our local universities get $62 combined and our major theater arts organization gets $45, out of a pot of $117,000. I encourage these organizations that were shorted to return their grant “check” back to Pride with a strongly worded letter.
Anthony Garcia
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Tony Pollack says:

The problem the LGBT community faces is not having specific, convincing arguments and dialogue that are effective in changing the attitudes and perspectives that led to Proposition 8 being on the ballot and then passing. Why aren't we directly challenging those paradigms and bringing the argument to the general public? We often preach to the choir but don't offer the general populace any solid, logical and perspective-changing ideas that might prompt individuals to challenge their own belief systems. Our lack of support in defeating Prop 8 is sad evidence of this statement. If a person believes that marriage should be exclusively between a man and a woman, what particular arguments have we put forth to the general public to convince people otherwise? Saying it's about "equality" hasn't worked. Saying it's about "human rights" hasn't worked. We can't afford to let mere "tolerance" be the mantra when we should expect more and expect to be accepted and respected.

The LGBT world needs a much stronger message, a message that sparks conversation and inspires ideas, one that causes a stir in the general public’s awareness and compels the straight world to consider the same thought processes regarding our equality which we innately possess as gays, lesbians, etc. So many people outside our community take their freedoms for granted because they are isolated from the need of ever having to consider what freedom really means and what equality requires. I believe it is our duty to encourage a more thorough understanding of the founding principles of our country and prompt a re-education of what those principles involve. Our nation was founded on the belief that "all *** are created equal". This belief, by design, requires us to be a country of inclusiveness and acceptance and have respect of all walks of life. We need to do more than remind people of the concept of equality. We need to convince the masses and prove our argument.

History is a great teacher. But history's lessons often need to be re-learned. The social segregation we face isn't much different than what earlier Americans confronted, whether that segregation came from varying religious beliefs, race, nationality or gender. All the steps that led to more inclusiveness inherently tie back to America's core identity. Understanding America’s core identity is essential to better the argument and have others empathize with our cause. Our nation’s identity, as a whole, should be highlighted and campaigned for, especially when challenging long-standing traditions or religious beliefs. Often held so sacred, those traditions and beliefs have historically been root factors for barring equality. For those reasons, America has had to undergo this exact process of affirming its core identity so that slavery could be abolished, to secure women the right to vote, and to end segregation in the 1960's. We must continue to carry the torch and wave the banner to be Americans first. That is the hard choice we ask others to make. It is exactly that outlook we ask others to share when we fight for our equality. As in the past, we ask them to be an American first and Christian/Catholic/Jew/Protestant/etc. second; or American first and traditionalist second, but always first an American. Being first an American is what empowers our country toward becoming a “more perfect union”. It has powerful meaning and intention and carries with it tremendous historical clout and reasoning.

Let’s campaign for an inclusive, ideological character in America. Let’s embrace the opportunity, harness the historical perspectives, emphasize our founding principles, and place our cause front and center in the minds of all citizens. Let’s make the cause of equality apparent to everyone, not just to those whose situations glaringly highlight how our country’s principles are sometimes orphaned. Let’s make this everyone’s fight! If we are all Americans first, we all become accepted, included and respected!

THE PARALLELS OF SEGREGATION...
YES! You can get on the bus, but you have to ride in the back of the bus!
YES! You can go to school, but you must go to a separate school just for your kind!
YES! You can drink from the water fountain, but only drink from that fountain reserved for your kind!
YES! You can have similar rights of marriage, but it can’t be called marriage for your kind!

YES! Proposition 8 has succeeded in it’s social segregation!!!

Prejudice forever shares common ground and always appears justified. It attaches itself to good intentions coated in fear.

America cannot be first in our hearts when prejudice succeeds.

We all deserve to breathe the same A.I.R. (Accepted, Included and Respected)

Nov 13, 2008 1:49 PM
Cassius says:

"The social segregation we face isn't much different than what earlier Americans confronted, whether that segregation came from varying religious beliefs, race, nationality or gender."

I completely agree.

Nov 13, 2008 3:02 PM
Greg Parry says:

So I am so sick of this 'traditional marriage' stuff. A traditional Mormon marriage includes wonderful stuff like underage girls married of to old men with lots of other wives. To me the gloves come off - the Mormons are not even Christians (if that matters) and have a nasty and really nutty history. Why don't we examine some of their more interesting 'traditions' which are so stupid and hateful even they decided to change.

Nov 13, 2008 7:23 PM
Oscar Blanco says:

Dear Editor:
Why don't do reverse psicology to the religion?. Let's get dress as they do (white shirts and black pants in bicycles like mormons, but being ourself, gays and lesbian..... dress with a sotana like catholics and go to work being ourself, gay and lesbian...) nothing in the constitution can prohibit it and we can be mixed with them and say to the word: Nothing is different, just the sexual preferences and at the same time they can be mixed with us and getting out of the closet.

Oscar Blanco

Nov 13, 2008 9:18 PM
tony bennett says:

My boss in a Mormon who donated a lot of thime and money to the YES PROP 8 side. Across my desk came an invatation ( wrongly directed ) for a party to thank the people that worked so long and hard for YES on 8 ... i would love to send you a copy of the invatation in hopes that we could organize a protest of the party. it is on November 25th so there is time to organize.

the RSVP on the letter goes the the e-mail... mkuper@prodigy.net maybe hundreds of e-mails to shut down her server

please let me know if the is anything we might be able to do or if you can redirect this to someone or somewhere that could help me

I am sending a copy of the invatation.

tony


Nov 14, 2008 7:20 PM
Allan says:

Tony,

Please just add the information here. Enter it accurately and completely, and let people make their own plans from there. Thank you for this information. Your efforts are the kind we need more of now. We can all decide if we want to go visit this self-congratulatory "party" for the passage of "Yes On Hate".

Nov 15, 2008 10:07 AM
andrew says:

I advise people to think twice before engaging in tactics that look like revenge.

There is a youtube video on the web right now that shows Prop. 8 opponents bullying a little old lady in Palm Springs.

It doesn't make the gay community look very good.

Nov 15, 2008 7:03 PM
JM says:

I voted NO on Prop 8 but I have always thought that we should leave "marriage" to the heteros. Why do we try so hard to have something that we can obtain in other ways. If what the gay community wants is equal rights then lets fight for that under another name. Yes, separate is not equal but does it matter when it's really about rights? Let's come up with a term that is more of what the LGBT community is about, Union of Love, or something and fight for this new term to have ALL the rights that marriage has. Regardless of what we call it, in the hearts of all the LGBT community it will be marriage. I believe that as a community we can come up with a better way to get the same rights as heterosexual couples. We are a much more creative, loving part of society so why not show it by finding another way to get the rights that we want?

Nov 17, 2008 10:58 PM
Jay Lacey says:

I have long struggled with the issue on Prop 8 and who exactly we need to hold accountable for the passing of a proposition that affects so many. I wonder how we best demonstrate our outrage and disappointment.

As I walked with 20,000 people from Balboa Park, I decided to read signs that read from, " No on Prop 8 " to " Equality for everyone " As I read I wondered to myself, " Where are the signs that really speak our voice? Where are the rallies and demonstrations that speak to the people who spoke to us on November 4th? " I wanted to see signs that said, " Where is Jessie Jackson!!" and signs that read, " No more on the down low." I wanted to be in the eye of the storm that marched down the streets of black and Latino neighborhoods to show our strength, outrage, and most of all our heartache to the percentage of the people who decided the fates of so many.

When do we, the people, who know deeply in our heart that this one issue of Proposition 8 not only has hurt us as individuals on paper but also in our deepest depths of our dreams to just feel like a citizen of this great country.

I ask one thing to the organizers of these demonstrations to think twice about exactly who you are fighting to join us in a basic human right. Its our time to hit hard and not look back. Its not about marching in gay neighborhoods that the majority of the no vote came from its time to go to the front line of the war. If you need some assistance where that true war is I would start not in your back yard but the places where you wouldn't think twice about visiting.

Nov 19, 2008 1:18 AM
A.B. Ellis says:

Please help me understand. Why are Gays so determined to align with traditional marriage? Doesn't this seem to redefine traditional marriage without regard for those who embrace the traditional family unit? Wouldn't it be easier to sponser legislation that defines "Non-traditional" marriage as something other than between a man and a women, but includes all the same privileges and rights? I deplore unequal treatment of any class of people including the disregard for what they hold dear. Lets get the rights to Gays they deserve, but leave traditional marriage alone.

Nov 19, 2008 3:38 PM

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